Daily Marriage Commitments
Paul Tripp wrote an incredibly challenging book called What Did You Expect? Redeeming the Realities of Marriage. This book calls husbands and wives to consider what their expectation were walking into marriage. The majority of couples walk into marriage with unrealistic expectations, leaving them unprepared for the day-to-day realities of marriage.
What Did You Expect? presents six practical commitments, which include honestly facing sin, weakness, and failure; willingness to change; and embodying Christ's love, will equip couples to develop a thriving, grace-based marriage in all circumstances and seasons of their relationship.
But in the book Tripp gives a list of corrolary commitments that should shape and texture every element of the marriage relationship. Here's that list for you (it's the same one that was in the bulletin just a couple weeks ago):
- Be willing to lose sleep so an important conversation can be completed
- Listen and consider when you have communicated a concern
- Care about your spouse's true needs and gladly work to meet them
- Work to communicate with your spouse in a way that is patient and kind
- Look for concrete ways to support and encourage your spouse
- Do the daily work of forgiveness and reconciliation so that you and your spouse can live in peace
- Deal with your marital differences in a way that communicates appreciation and respect
- Make time to enjoy your physical intimacy and friendship
- Look for ways to help your spouse bear the burden of responsibilities that he or she carries
- Partner with your spouse in the daily work of maintaining your physical surroundings
- Never stop pursuing your spouse romantically
- Do not let the sun go down on a moment of hurt, misunderstanding, or anger
- Look for ways to encourage and develop your spiritual communion
- Daily commit to overlooking minor offenses
- Studiously avoid conflict over things that are unimportant
- Speak in a way that give your spouse grace
- Encourage and support your spouse in areas of interest that you do not share
- Be willing to make the sacrifices necessary to keep your marriage a priority
- Daily search for verbal and nonverbal ways to communicate your love
- Do not leave a conversation until you have reached unity and understanding
- never demand of your spouse what you are unwilling to give
- Continually remind your spouse that he or she is not alone in the marriage
- Do things you wouldn't normally do simply because they make your spouse happy
- Fight the busyness that would get in the way of giving your marriage attention
- Be willing to sacrifice personal activities and leisure for the sake of your marriage
- Work so your spouse has the downtime, rest, and retreat he needs
- Work to build relationships of love and respect with your family
- Do not stop working until your marriage is all God intended it to be
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